I SHARE the concerns expressed by psychologist Paul Jambunathan about the growing influence of maids on our children’s lives.

Many parents are overlooking their parenting role nowadays due to various commitments. Even lower-income and middle-class parents are failing in their duties.

What actually happens is that many parents do not play their role effectively right from childhood.

They only become concerned when the children end up with problems in their adolescent years.

Probably, the problems faced by children, especially adolescents, are due to this negligent attitude of parents.

Recently, a teenager’s mother phoned me. She inquired whether any hostel or home is available for her 15-year-old daughter. She wants a home that can discipline her child. What a pitiful state!

I believe the mother (and perhaps the father) did not play their parental role effectively during the daughter’s childhood.

How can someone other than parents be in the best position to raise a disciplined child?

This is crux of the problem today. Parents seem to pass the buck to someone when it is their responsibility and duty.

How to solve these problems?

I advocate more parenting programmes. I conduct parenting workshops in many schools. In this way, I believe I can assist in alleviating problems faced by parents to a certain extent.

In my programmes, through interactive activities, question-answer sessions and the like, I do manage to create some awareness among parents of the significant role they play.

Whatever it is, the role of parents cannot be substituted by others, be it other family members or maids. It is a responsibility parents cannot afford to neglect.

Children are the most precious treasure a community can possess, for in them are the promise and guarantee of the future.

Source: NST – May 16, 2008